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Face & Hair – C-

Mouth is way too big and the eyes are slightly too far apart.  I fucking hate bangs, too.  Make-up is too thick on the cheeks.

Body – A-

Asian women usually have nice, thin bodies and this girl is no exception.  Arms, waist, legs are all great.

Clothing – D+

Looks like her dress was put in the microwave and blew up.  I’m waiting for the popcorn to start falling out.  The top is straight from the Hanes collection.  Black stockings and shoes are kind of hot, though.

Overall Look - C+

Recommendation: grow out the bangs, get a tight red dress, and ease up on the make-up

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Face & Hair – B+

She has a baby fat face.  No chin, small lips, and fat cheeks on yet another girl.  Eyes are big and beautiful and her hair is very nicely colored and styled.

Body – C-

Feet are too small to hold us such a massive amount of flesh.  Arms are nice, hips are too big and legs could crush a man with a flex of the thighs.  There’s a reason she’s wearing black.

Clothing – B

I like the dress except for the puffy shoulders and the gold thing above her right hip.  The shoes are shit.

Overall Look – C+

Recommendation: lose the hip and thigh fat and get a better attitude

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Face & Hair – B-

Hair is too flat on top and the part in the middle is weird.  Cheeks are too fat and chin is too short.  Plus, she looks plain tired.  Nice skin tone and pretty mouth.

Body – B

Legs are too girthy and tits are too small.  Great toned arms and shoulders.  Stomach seems to be thin which gives her a decent curvy shape.

Clothing – C+

Hate the one arm covered and one arm not look.  Make up your fucking mind.  Short enough to make Mr. Happy chart a course to the watering hole.  Those shoes are fucking hideous.  Show your feet if you have good ones and cover them up if you don’t.

Overall Look - B

Recommendation: stop playing video games and get off you ass and into the gym

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Face & Hair – B+

Although slightly boring, she has a naturally beautiful face.  Hair style is too drab and needs to be more exciting.  Beautiful eyes, gorgeous lips, and a decent nose.  Eyebrows are a little too bushy.

Body – B

She’s thin but her shoulders are too triangular and her arms are freakishly long.  And those feet are painful to look at.  Toes going every which way.  You are definitely a closed toe shoe type of girl.

Clothing – E

There is so much wrong here.  Ugly color, ugly style, ugly shoes, ugly dress.  That’s all.

Overall Look - C

Recommendation: if you picked that dress out, stop it, and let someone else cover your body with clothes.  and quit listening to the Jonas Brothers because I can tell your that kind of girl.

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Face & Hair – C-

Her face makes me not want to buy things.  Hooker make-up is way overdone and that is a serious case of sex hair.  Arrogant smirk and large left eye makes me highly uncomfortable.

Body – B+

Bit of a big ass and moles on her chest but other than that it’s a pretty banging bod.  Trust me, put your hand over her face and give it a shot.

Clothing – D+

A black and read feather dress is exactly what you should wear if you want people to laugh at you behind your back.  Only good part is the plunging neckline.

Overall Look – C+

Recommendation: solid color dress and buy a mirror so you can be as traumatized as the rest of us

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Face & Hair – C-

The Sheryl Crow mouth with the thin lips and teeth are a huge turn off.  I hate thin lips.  Her ears stick out and her left eye is crossed.  Chin is too strong and her hair is lacking any effort whatsoever.

Body – B

Probably not too bad but the jacket covers it all up.  Bottom half looks alright but the top half needs two thing to be inflated about two sizes.

Clothing – D-

No one wants to have to stare at ugly glasses.  Would rather stare at your ugly face instead.  Jacket is a huge failure and that pearl necklace or whatever it is should be given back to your grandmother.  I like the shoes fro some reason, though.

Overall Look – C

Recommendation: stop hanging out with the lesbians and find a gay guy to give you tips on how to dress more like a woman

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Face & Hair – D+

That’s some chin and mouth wrinkles she has going on.  Eyes are slightly too far apart and the beak-like nose should be feeding her young.  The hair is plain and looks like it was styled by a hippie.

Body – B+

The perfect girl for a bag over the head.  Great, thin body.  Nicely proportioned but with shoulders that are too straight across.  Those hips look damn good.

Clothing – A-

I love the dress.  The skirt hugs her curves nicely.  Classy look with a bit of sexy thrown in.

Overall Look – C+

Recommendation: work on the face because it really hurts my ability to get excited

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Face & Hair – B-

Another case of 80s hair gone wrong.  Too blond and wavy.  Nose is fat and crooked to the right.  Is she storing nuts in her cheeks?  Mouth is attractive and sexy.

Body – B+

Body is actually in pretty good shape.  Boobs are lacking a bit but the waist and hips are great.  Also, her legs are sexy even though the knees are pretty knobby.

Clothing – C-

Whoever designed that dress should go into hiding.  It’s completely hideous.  The boots are sexy as all hell.  Take the rest off and just wear those.

Overall Look – C+

Recommendation: straighten and darken the hair, wear solid colors, and get a nose job

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Face & Hair - C-

YIKES!  Super white skin and red lipstick should be outlawed.  Big, crazy eyes and bushy eyebrows cover her midget-like scrunched head.  Hair isn’t too bad but is flat.

Body – C+

No tits, anorexic arms and shoulders and neck muscles that pop out are disgusting.  Quick, somebody wave a Twinkie and some Ipecac in front of her.

Clothing – D+

Why do women wear these on piece things with big ugly belts that don’t even fit properly?  Don’t try to show cleavage when you don’t actually have any.

Overall Look – C-

Recommendation: stop staring at me, i’m getting scared

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Face & Hair – B

Head is too big for her body.  Cheeks are puffy and her chin is pointy.  Someone must have punched her in the nose, too.  Hot, black hair and sexy eyes.

Body – B

Superb feet.  Very, very sexy.  But I don’t know, she just looks like she could kick my ass.  She’s skinny how I like but there is something off with her.  Oh, and her neck is crooked.

Clothing – D

Is this 1985?  Acid washed jeans and a sweater my sister wore to a Bon Jovi concert.  And she should get some new shoes because her’s are really falling apart.

Overall Look – C+

Recommendation: give up the lesbian look and make an effort to look like you won’t just walk up and kick a guy in the balls