Chris Pratt and Anna Faris

Um, homosayswhat?…

“I knew I wanted to marry her pretty soon [after I met her,]” he told PEOPLE Thursday at the premiere for his new NBC series. “It took a while for me to admit it, because it would be crazy to be like, ‘I want to marry you’ the first day I met her. But I could have!”

Pratt, 29, also explained that although he’s wearing a wedding band already, the couple have yet to tie the knot. “I just kind of wanted one,” he said. “She got one and I was like, ‘I want one!’ ”

Source:  People

“She got one and I was like, ‘I want one!”  WTF!  Sir, please remove your your man card from your wallet and tear it up immediately.  You know what, I really like Anna Faris.  She’s funny, talented, and seems like she would be a lot of fun in the sack.  And because of my genuine affection for her, I would like to save her from years of disappointment and ultimately a tremendous heart break.  So I’m just gonna say it.  Anna, this guy is 1000% gay.  Not gay happy like he’s pleasantly surprised his team won the Super Bowl, more like gay gay to the point where he’s chocking on a ball that’s been jammed in his mouth to deaden the screames of pain from the gerbil in his ass.  I hate to be the one to tell you this, but it’s better you know.  Now from what I’ve been told your supposed to run over here and let me console you until you decide to sleep with me.  Sorry, I don’t make the rules.